an assortment of things

Someone told me this morning I hadn't put anything on my blog for a week. Well, she was off by a day or so, but anyway, this one is for D. Love it or leave it.

I know that I've mentioned before that I see myself as the 'norm' of human life. I am the one who is in the center of the road. I am the one whose opinions and thoughts are the opinions and thoughts of the multitudes. That's one way I see myself.

I also know that I am so far to the left both politically and theologically that I often scare myself.

How those two thoughts can reside in one brain I will leave you to ponder. But it is the truth: I am so liberal it makes even me crazy AND I think I'm the medium and the mean--the norm in this culture.

When Obama was elected I was elated, beside myself with joy, at peace with my normative existence. I was in the majority, as I always knew I was....But then, after the initial joy, I got nervous. I'm not used to being in the 'majority'. I don't know how to 'win gracefully' since most of the time I'm on the losing side. That's the problem with thinking you are the norm and knowing you are so far to the left on most things that an interment camp would be a blessing if Sarah Palin was President...most likely, I'd be eliminated ultimately.

*Would Mexico take Texas back if we offered? The legislature down there in the Evil Empire is considering a bill that would deny citizenship to children born of non--citizens. What in the hell are they thinking? Also, a bill that would not allow a child to come to school if they couldn't prove their citizenship. Let's take down the statue of Liberty and let it sink in the ocean. Texas is my recommendation for, if we ever do it, a 'surgical nuke'. 'Huddled masses longing to be free' don't bother considering Texas....

*It's Trash Day in my part of Cheshire. I love, absolutely love, Trash Day. All is well. God is in his heaven and all is right with the world. (I had to correct my typing. I wrote "Todd is in his heaven..." I'm not sure I've ever known anyone named Todd. But if I did, I'd recommend him for deity duty.

Trash Day gives order to the chaotic universe. I take out the trash and the recycle stuff and put it carefully on the edge of the front yard. When I walk the dog on Trash Day, he sniffs everyone's trash on our block. It makes us a community in a way. We all have trash. I actually notice who has more trash than recycle stuff. Trash Day gives us a chance to either be humble (more trash than recycle) or be mistakenly proud. Either way there is something to ponder.

A friend of mine today told me about a recent bowel movement. I thought we were in the nursing home, sharing elimination stories. I recently had a bladder biopsy--negative, I'm thankful to say--but it made me terribly aware of elimination.

Two old guys are sitting in wheel chairs in the lobby of the nursing home.

One says to the other, "I wish I could remember how old I am."

The other guy says, "stand up and drop your pants and I'll tell you."

So the first guy, wondering how old he is, stands up and drops his pants making the aides and visitors and residents freak out.

After he's re-dressed and in his chair, the other guy says, "You're 87."

The man who exposed himself asks, "how could you know?"

The other guy says, "you told me yesterday...."

Sometimes you are the one who drops your pants in public, in a metaphorical way, of course. And sometimes you are the one who makes another expose themselves for no real purpose. (Another metaphor, of course.) We might be well served pondering those moment in our lives from both directions. Just a thought.