Enough hospital today!

I had to go to two hospitals today. Not pleasant in the best of times. Truly awful in these oh-so-un-normal times.

This morning I went to Waterbury Hospital to get my every two weeks injections of Zolaire, that has changed me life. Before Zolaire, this time of year would find me deep in allergic reactions, even to the point of having to take Prednisone. Not since Zolaire. Sniffles, nothing much else.

And I've been doing this for (I'm lost in linear time!) 4 or 5 years at least. Usually it's in and out in half an hour. Today it took me 50 minutes to simply register for the treatment because the hospital has laid off some of the registration staff just as they are opening for more registrations. Luckily, I was 6 feet or more from others waiting because some of them were quite angry.

They take your temperature when you come in and again at the Outpatient Therapy office. 98.5 both times.

Besides that, there was a section of I-84 that went down from 3 lanes to 1 for a couple of miles. But I was running early and made it in time.

Then this afternoon I had to go to Middlestate Hospital in Meriden to see my oncologist.

I don't have cancer, but my PSA has been rising in spite of the fact that I had my prostrate removed a decade ago. Doctors don't really know what that means, but they know it isn't good.

So I had a shot for three months that will limit my testosterone and hopefully lower the bad PSA somewhere in my body. We'll see.

Temperature going in and at the office again. Blood work, talk to the Doctor and then waiting for the shot. I was there an hour for a shot that took less that 15 seconds.

I don't like hospitals, so today was hard. Plus it was my turn to go for groceries. We used to go to the store daily, very European, but now we only go a couple of times a week and buy lots more that what's for dinner!

A long day for me.

Wash your hands. Wear a mask. Stay away, if you can, from hospitals.

bugs

Winters in New England (though this was a mild one, compared to others) are long enough that I forget about bugs.

Bugs are back--crawling, flying, buzzing, darting, sometimes biting.

I only kill the flies.

I take others that are in the house (if I can manage) outside and release them back to the wild--or at least what is 'wild' in a town in Connecticut.

I even take the 'stink bugs' that Bern hates to freedom.

But I don't like bugs much. The interrupt my life in ways I don't appreciate. Bees and wasps drive me inside. Smaller flying bugs land on the book I'm reading and won't go away. Ants climb on my feet and sandals. Butterflies and moths are fine--though the latter spook me a bit. I don't know why.

I feel about most bugs the way the President feels about Inspector Generals. But unlike me, he kills them (fires them!) left and right. Four this month.

Inspector Generals of each part of government are there, by law, to keep a eye out for wrong doing. Many serve though several administrations. They are not supposed to be partisan in any way.

And the President fires them for keeping too close an eye on things.

Mike Pompeo and his wife were being looked at for misusing aides to do menial and personal things for them.

So, keeping an eye out ends up getting you fired.

At least I only kill flies.

I let the rest live.

I wish our President did too--and had people keeping a close eye on him and his administration.

Too much to wish, I guess.

In normal times 5

In normal times I would have gone to one of the three churches I serve and everyone would have seen me and heard me and we would have celebrated the Eucharist and had coffee hour and loved each other.

But today, in these anything BUT normal times, we did church on Zoom and Face Book and on phones and no one could see me, though they could hear me and listen to my sermon and Bryan's celebration of Eucharist. I saw myself through it all. Weird.


Zoom broke down on Sunday morning between 9 and noon in many parts of the country--especially it seems, New England. Covid-19 and Zoom don't seem to like New England.

Folks reading froze up. Folks doing prayers dropped out. It was weird, but not so surprising in such un-normal times. Internet technology is just like most every thing else. S*** happens.

It was fine in the end. I've talked to several folks who said 'listening' was better than 'nothing'.

Which is true always.

I could see one of my cousins who tuned in from WV, but not the other one.

I say 'cousins' because we are, somehow.It's just on my father's side of my family, relationships were vague and varying. I called lots of people 'aunt' and 'uncle' who weren't.

My mother's side of the family was strict to being ridiculous about 'relationships'.

My uncle Sid, my father's brother, happened to marry my mother's 1st cousin. Sid and Callie's two children told me that we were 'double first cousins' and since I was much younger, that made sense.

When I told my maternal grandmother that--Lina Manona Sadler Jones--she said 'humpf' and told me that we were first cousins on my father's side but third cousins on my mother's side.

Well, that wasn't the only distinctions between the sides of my family. The Bradley's liked a drink and the Jones' were non-drinkers. The Jones' were all Evangelical church-goers and the Bradley's (except for my father) avoided church whenever they could.

No wonder I have so many conflicting opinions....

In normal times 4

In normal times, I'd be thinking about which of the three churches I was scheduled for tomorrow and thinking about my sermon and how long the drive will take--so I'd know when to get up.

But these aren't normal times.

I'll set my alarm for 9:11 a.m. and be part of the zoom and facebook live service at 10.

Bryan and I are never at the same church unless there is joint service with the Bishop, but we'll be there on zoom. I'll do the sermon and blessing and Bryan will do the rest.

It's been working well for weeks now, but it's not the same as normal time.

What will 'normal time' look like when there is a break from this virus?

I'm not sure.

Not as much touching, for sure--though that's hard for church...all three churches are hug filled places.

Masks are fine with me--but for how long? Always, that seems severe, but if it is necessary I will do it.

I had asthma as a child and get shots of Zolaire every two weeks to control any bronchial problems. The drug does control that, but what would the virus do?

I've come to grips because of my age and bronchial problems, that if I get the virus, I will die.

I realize that and therefore will obey all the rules as long as they are in place.

Lots of people like me, I'm sure.

So while those idiots protest without masks or social distancing and carry weapons to 'reopen' states, I will play by the rules as long as rules are needed.

You should too.

Really, you should in these oh-so-not normal times.

I don't get it

The University of Chicago Divinity School did a poll that said 2/3 of Americans believe the corona virus is a 'message from God'.

I don't get it.

Which God do they mean, the Old Testament Yahweh who sent plagues and pestilence and wiped out people? Or the God/Father/Mother of Jesus who urged us to love one another and even be kind and pray for our enemies?

A sign from God, in my mind, any message God would send, would be of hope and promise and life--not a virus of death.

Now, to give them credit, those people in the survey did say that the sign from God was to tell the world to 'change its ways': to stamp out poverty and racism, to narrow the gap between rich and poor, to raise wages, to improve healthcare for all people, things like that.

And hopefully, when the is better contained, we will have the will and leadership to accomplish those things. It is just a shame that thousands must die to inspire us to level our differences in health and wages and racial disparity.

But to say 'God sent it to teach us a lesson' is beyond my theological grasp.

No God I know and love and trust would do that.

Not now, not ever....

In Normal times 3

In normal times, since it is 9:19 p.m., we would have wrapped up the last evening session of Making a Difference and be going to bed ready for the transformation of tomorrow.

MAD is 'transformational technology' (even though my spell check doesn't know that t-word) and the last morning is when we actually see people's faces and body language change for the better.

It is a remarkable experience to see that. And even more remarkable to experience that.

We end the workshop with centering prayer--which has been a part of each day several times--and then go eat lunch before leaving, all new.

For my part, I can't over-state what the workshop has meant to me and many others over the years. A new start, a 'beginning' with no end, something beyond words but felt deeply.

I miss not being there at Holy Cross for tomorrow!

I will hold that longing in my heart.

But I am more moved by how safe we are, here in Cheshire, and how no one in the three little rural churches has the virus. And how our children and grand-daughters are safe.

These are trying times.

Meditation helps.

I do centering prayer--just sitting for 20 minutes longing to be present to the God within me.

I also do the Jesus prayer. Inhale and say, to yourself, "Lord Jesus Christ", the exhale and say in your mind, "have mercy on me".

Do either and you will be calmed.

And there are lots of videos on line that are soothing. My friend Charles sent it to me. Try it out.

https://youtu.be/qsDU_tTgsFw

try that one and be rewarded.

Bird songs and too, too soon

There are so many birds in our yard.

I took the dog out at 9 p.m. and they were still singing. Lots of song birds and a few too many crows.

Crows are the smartest birds, by the way. They figure out things you wouldn't think a bird brain could figure out. Like stealing shiny objects. One sat on a tree this morning and stared at me for five minutes. I was feeling a little unsafe when he finally cawed and flew away. And a group of crows are called a 'murder of crows'. Not a comforting title.

But even crows would be smart enough to know it is too, too soon to be opening the country in the face of this pandemic.

Staying home and staying safe is working--but not enough yet.

The problem is the President is ignoring the pleas of public health experts and scientists because he feel a robust economy is his only chance for re-election.

Another problem is that the virus takes a couple of weeks to show up, even if there was enough testing--which, in spite of the President's statements, there isn't enough.

So states like Georgia and Texas and many others re-opening won't know for 14 days or so how much the virus has spread. Then it will be too late to avoid needless deaths.

Joe Biden said, the other day, if he were President he would tell people to listen to Dr. Fauci and other scientists and not to politicians.

Would that he were!

Many Americans who will die in the too soon re-opening wouldn't if we extended the shut down.

Bird songs are soothing. The deeply partisan politics in our nation during a national emergency is anything but soothing.

Anxiety and Fear fit better for that.

Listen to the birds to soothe your heart and soul.

Vote in November to end the anxiety and fear you feel.