Sunday, December 21, 2014

OK, I'm man enough to admit it....

I just spent 45 minutes of my ever dwindling time on this mortal coil watching the end of the last "Colbert Report" twice and a video of Stephen Colbert breaking character at his own jokes. You could find them easily enough by goggling "The Colbert report". And however fast your time on earth is diminishing, you won't regret it.

What I am ashamed of is that I almost clicked on a video of one of the HOUSEWIVES of somewhere weeping as she told how she had 'accidentally' posted nude photos on the Internet.

Really?

Here's my advice, in order of importance:

1) Unless you are George Clooney or Sandra Bullock or Adam Levine or Jeniffer Lawrence, DON'T, do not, never take nude photos of yourself. Not only is nobody interested, it's a crazy thing to do.

2) If you are none of those people and you do (beyond all the realms of logic and possibility) do take nude photos of yourself, take them with a throw away camera, not with a cell phone or a tablet--that way they can't 'accidentally' end up on line.

3) Examine in your heart of hearts and, if you have one, your 'brain' not only why you would take nude photos of yourself, but how on earth they could be uploaded to the Internet by 'accident'.

4) "Accidentally uploading"  ANYTHING WHATSOEVER to the Internet is very close to the distinction I have that is impossible. So, don't tell me that crappy lie.

5) Rather than somehow taking a picture of yourself nude and 'accidentally' uploading it to the Internet, take a nude photo of yourself and send it to who you want to have it (since there is no other reason I can imagine for taking a nude photo of yourself) and put it in an envelope and put an address on it for the one you want to see it and mail it. Unless their is a voyeur in the postal service (which I'm sure they are) who psychically knows your nude photo is in that particular envelope, it will only go to who you want to see it.

6) Finally...Why on earth would you take a nude photo of yourself????

7) Rather than take a nude photo of yourself, go watch the end of the last episode of 'The Colbert Report' a couple of times. 

Doesn't that make more sense?

And you won't have to go on TV to tearfully reveal how you 'accidentally' did that....

Oh, wait a minute...you got to go on TV to reveal your almost unfathomable stupidity...

Well, that's reason enough. I get it now. Continue as you were....



 


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some ponderings by an aging white man who is an Episcopal priest in Connecticut. Now retired but still working and still wondering what it all means...all of it.