Linear time and the calendar tell me that I'm 67 and will be 68 in less than 60 days.
It's just that I don't feel that old.
Oh, my bones and joints do, from time to time, that old and more. But I've never believed my 'body' was 'who I am'. In my inner life I feel much younger--or no age at all.
It's like the thermometer on out back porch. Right now, at 9:33 p.m., that thermometer says it is 18 degrees Fahrenheit outside in Cheshire. The weather channel says it is several degrees warmer than that. I believe our thermometer, not some meteorologist somewhere. That temperature is 'out there', our back porch is 'in here'.
I often ask groups to raise their hands if they believe in the 'immortality of the soul', and most always most everyone raises their hands.
Then I tell them they're all heretics since the Nicene Creed and orthodox Christian theology believes in 'the resurrection of the body', not the immortality of the soul.
But I don't chide them much, since I believe my 'inner life' is the 'real ME' and not my body--my outer life.
After driving for a couple of hours, my body reminds me, when I get out of the car, how old it is. Believe you me, it reminds me.
But my inner life--my mind and heart and, I guess, my soul--is much more attune to getting into the rest stop and let my body relieve itself than it is to my chronological age. My 'inner self' has to take care of my 'outer self' a lot!
I wonder if that ever stops, if you ever feel as old 'inside' as you do 'outside'? I hope not. I enjoy being who I am inside more than I enjoy the limitations my 'outer self' has begun to impose.
I guess I'll find out someday. Or not....
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About Me
- Under The Castor Oil Tree
- some ponderings by an aging white man who is an Episcopal priest in Connecticut. Now retired but still working and still wondering what it all means...all of it.
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