Embarrassment is a natural human emotion. We shouldn't fell ashamed, or anything really, about being embarrassed--it's just something humans feel. Yet, don't we all regret our embarrassment? It's akin to regretting the 'love' and 'compassion' we feel--all of them being emotions--but somehow embarrassment is off the scale of shame and...well embarrassment--to feel.
So, today I had my annual urologist visit.
(Woman can think gynecologist and sympathize with my plight.)
Back in 2005, I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. It was out of the blue and I really handled it well. I got an appointment with Sloan Kettering's top diagnostician--a woman, by the way--and asked her what to do after she reviewed all my medical records.
(First I asked her why she was so interested in the prostate and she said: "it's a nasty little gland and I don't have one, so I can be totally objective.")
Then I said, "if I were your brother or father, what would you tell me to do?"
She answered, "jerk that thing out as soon as possible."
She gave me the name of a surgeon in Greenwich who she said was one of the 'best of the best' and I had my prostate 'jerked out'. Then radiation for a month. Then, for some reason, the urologist in Greenwich no longer took my insurance so I found one in Meriden-- my GP's urologist.
My blood work showed a problem and he gave me hormone injections for a year. Since then all has been well.
But my urologist had back surgery and my annual appointment had to be shifted to his partner, Dr. Wong.
Dr. Wong is (obviously) Asian and a woman. And she looks a lot like my daughter-in-law, Cathy Chen.
Once I realized the likeness, I got very nervous and started talking non-stop. I almost told her my life story before she did what urologists always do to men (women, think gynecological exam).
Having a young Asian woman who looked a lot like my daughter in law stick her finger up my butt was, I tell you, the ultimate embarrassment....
No kidding....
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About Me
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- some ponderings by an aging white man who is an Episcopal priest in Connecticut. Now retired but still working and still wondering what it all means...all of it.
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