ok, I feel ready

I put in a lot of time today on the Gospel of Philip. I feel ready to lead it without faking it.

It's amazing how much you forget when you're not looking when you're 68. I've taught the Gospel of Philip before, a couple of years ago, and probably didn't need this much prep.

I'm 68. Just writing that, without saying it out loud, shakes me to my core, the very center of my being.

How can I be this old? How can I have a son who is 40 and a daughter who is 37? A wife 65.  And granddaughters 9 and 6 almost? How did this happen? How does so much time pass?

My mind and heart and soul feels like they're approaching 35. My body, on the other hand, knows there are several decades more to take in mind.

When I wrote "68" up above, a part or me said, "wait, that must be 58", but I'm on social security and medicare and have been for 6 years.

How did I get this old? Back in my pseuto-Hippie days, I thought I would live fast, love hard, die young and leave a beautiful memory. I didn't think I'd make it to 50, much less 60 and being 19 months from 70 is like crazy!!!

Time flies when you're having fun.

I guess that's it. Not as bad as it could be: 'time flies when you're miserable.'