Tomorrow

Tomorrow I'm officiating at the marriage of P. and B.

I've known P. since she was 12 years old. I baptized P and B's daughter 10 years ago. They've always been together but just decided 'it was time' to be married.

I love P's family deeply. They are from a minor island in the Caribbean that was devastated last year but is coming back. One of their friends told me that Robert DiNiro is making a land-grab on the island, trying to buy much of it up instead of trying to rehab it. Just lost all faith in him.

A huge family and full of love.

Tomorrow will be a homecoming for me--the service is as St. John's in Waterbury. And it will be a joy.

When I do post marriage counseling the first question I ask the couple is this: Tell me why you want to get married. There's only one wrong answer.

If they say, "we're in love" I tell them that's the one wrong answer.

I say that because I know what they mean is the 'feeling' they get when they look at each other. Feelings come and go. "Love" has to be more than a feeling.

English is not a very good language for discussing 'love'. I can say: "I love my grandchildren" and "I love peanut butter cup ice cream" and the language doesn't distinguish between the difference between Emma/Morgan/Tegan/Eleanor and ice cream.

Greek does it better. Three very different words all translated as 'love' in English.

EROS--you know what that means!

PHILIOS--love between friends as in Philadelphia.

AGAPE--love that gives itself away, would die for the other.

So, in my short homily tomorrow I'll make those distinctions and urge Agape for P and B and everyone there.

Agape is 'love' spelled LOVE......